Tuesday, October 17, 2006
Some random stuff
A few quotes to ponder.....
“If homosexuality is a disease, let’s all call in sick to work: ‘Hello. Can’t work today. Still queer.’”
~ Robin Tyler
“I’d rather be black than gay because when you’re black you don’t have to tell your mother.”~ Charles Pierce
“Dear Abby, In response to a reader who complained that a gay couple was moving in across the street and wanted to know what he could do to improve the quality of the neighborhood. ‘You could move.’”
~ Abigail Van Buren
“The one bonus of not lifting the ban on gays in the military is that the next time the government mandates a draft we can all declare we are homosexual instead of running off to Canada.”
~ Lorne Bloch
“Why can’t they have gay people in the army? Personally, I think they are just afraid of a thousand guys with M16s going, ‘Who’d you call a faggot?’”
~ Jon Stewart
“My lesbianism is an act of Christian charity. All those women out there praying for a man, and I’m giving them my share.”
~ Rita Mae Brown
“Soldiers who are not afraid of guns, bombs, capture, torture or death say they are afraid of homosexuals. Clearly we should not be used as soldiers; we should be used as weapons.”
~ Letter to the Editor, ‘The Advocate’
“You don’t have to be straight to be in the military; you just have to be able to shoot straight.”
~ Barry Goldwater
“Why is it that, as a culture, we are more comfortable seeing two men holding guys than holding hands?”
~ Ernest Gaines
“My own belief is that there is hardly anyone whose sexual life, if it were broadcast, would not fill the world at large with surprise and horror.”
~ W. Somerset Maugham
“Drag is where a man wears everything a lesbian won’t.”
~ Author Unknown
“If male homosexuals are called ‘gay’ then female homosexuals should be called ‘ecstatic’.”
~ Shelly Roberts
“My mother took me to a psychiatrist when I was fifteen because she thought I was a latent homosexual. There was nothing latent about it.”
~ Amanda Bearse
“It always seems to me a bit pointless to disapprove of homosexuality. It’s like disapproving of rain…”
~ Francis Maude
“The only queer people are those who don’t love anybody…”
~ Rita Mae Brown
“The Bible contains six admonishments to homosexuals and 362 admonishments to heterosexuals. That doesn’t mean that God doesn’t love heterosexuals. It’s just that they need more supervision.”
~ Lynn Lavner
“If Michelangelo had been straight, the Sistine Chapel would have been wallpapered.”
~ Robin Tyler
“Pronouns make it hard to keep our sexual orientation a secret when our co-workers ask us about our weekend. ‘I had a great time with…them.’ Great! Now they don’t think you’re queer-just a big slut!”
~ Judy Carter
_____________________________
When Insults had class....
"He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire."
-- Winston Churchill
"A modest little person, with much to be modest about."
-- Winston Churchill
"I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure."
-- Clarence Darrow
"He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary."
-- William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway)
"Poor Faulkner. Does he really think big emotions come from big words?"
-- Ernest Hemingway (about William Faulkner)
"Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time reading it."
-- Moses Hadas
"He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know."
-- Abraham Lincoln
"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it."
-- Groucho Marx
"I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it."
-- Mark Twain
"He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends."
-- Oscar Wilde
"I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play, bring a friend... if you have one."
-- George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill
"Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second... if there is one."
-- Winston Churchill, in response
I feel so miserable without you, it's almost like having you here."
-- Stephen Bishop
"He is a self-made man and worships his creator."
-- John Bright
I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial."
-- Irvin S. Cobb
"He is not only dull himself, he is the cause of dullness in others."
-- Samuel Johnson
"He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up."
-- Paul Keating
"He had delusions of adequacy."
-- Walter Kerr
"There's nothing wrong with you that reincarnation won't cure."
-- Jack E. Leonard
"He has the attention span of a lightning bolt."
-- Robert Redford
"They never open their mouths without subtracting from the sum of human knowledge."
-- Thomas Brackett Reed
"He inherited some good instincts from his Quaker forebears, but by diligent hard work, he overcame them."
-- James Reston (about Richard Nixon)
"He loves nature in spite of what it did to him."
-- Forrest Tucker
"Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?"
-- Mark Twain
"His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork."
-- Mae West
"Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go."
-- Oscar Wilde
"He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather than illumination."
-- Andrew Lang (1844-1912)
"He has Van Gogh's ear for music."
-- Billy Wilder ¶ 10/17/2006 12:49:00 PM
“If homosexuality is a disease, let’s all call in sick to work: ‘Hello. Can’t work today. Still queer.’”
~ Robin Tyler
“I’d rather be black than gay because when you’re black you don’t have to tell your mother.”~ Charles Pierce
“Dear Abby, In response to a reader who complained that a gay couple was moving in across the street and wanted to know what he could do to improve the quality of the neighborhood. ‘You could move.’”
~ Abigail Van Buren
“The one bonus of not lifting the ban on gays in the military is that the next time the government mandates a draft we can all declare we are homosexual instead of running off to Canada.”
~ Lorne Bloch
“Why can’t they have gay people in the army? Personally, I think they are just afraid of a thousand guys with M16s going, ‘Who’d you call a faggot?’”
~ Jon Stewart
“My lesbianism is an act of Christian charity. All those women out there praying for a man, and I’m giving them my share.”
~ Rita Mae Brown
“Soldiers who are not afraid of guns, bombs, capture, torture or death say they are afraid of homosexuals. Clearly we should not be used as soldiers; we should be used as weapons.”
~ Letter to the Editor, ‘The Advocate’
“You don’t have to be straight to be in the military; you just have to be able to shoot straight.”
~ Barry Goldwater
“Why is it that, as a culture, we are more comfortable seeing two men holding guys than holding hands?”
~ Ernest Gaines
“My own belief is that there is hardly anyone whose sexual life, if it were broadcast, would not fill the world at large with surprise and horror.”
~ W. Somerset Maugham
“Drag is where a man wears everything a lesbian won’t.”
~ Author Unknown
“If male homosexuals are called ‘gay’ then female homosexuals should be called ‘ecstatic’.”
~ Shelly Roberts
“My mother took me to a psychiatrist when I was fifteen because she thought I was a latent homosexual. There was nothing latent about it.”
~ Amanda Bearse
“It always seems to me a bit pointless to disapprove of homosexuality. It’s like disapproving of rain…”
~ Francis Maude
“The only queer people are those who don’t love anybody…”
~ Rita Mae Brown
“The Bible contains six admonishments to homosexuals and 362 admonishments to heterosexuals. That doesn’t mean that God doesn’t love heterosexuals. It’s just that they need more supervision.”
~ Lynn Lavner
“If Michelangelo had been straight, the Sistine Chapel would have been wallpapered.”
~ Robin Tyler
“Pronouns make it hard to keep our sexual orientation a secret when our co-workers ask us about our weekend. ‘I had a great time with…them.’ Great! Now they don’t think you’re queer-just a big slut!”
~ Judy Carter
_____________________________
When Insults had class....
"He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire."
-- Winston Churchill
"A modest little person, with much to be modest about."
-- Winston Churchill
"I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure."
-- Clarence Darrow
"He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary."
-- William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway)
"Poor Faulkner. Does he really think big emotions come from big words?"
-- Ernest Hemingway (about William Faulkner)
"Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time reading it."
-- Moses Hadas
"He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know."
-- Abraham Lincoln
"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it."
-- Groucho Marx
"I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it."
-- Mark Twain
"He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends."
-- Oscar Wilde
"I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play, bring a friend... if you have one."
-- George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill
"Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second... if there is one."
-- Winston Churchill, in response
I feel so miserable without you, it's almost like having you here."
-- Stephen Bishop
"He is a self-made man and worships his creator."
-- John Bright
I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial."
-- Irvin S. Cobb
"He is not only dull himself, he is the cause of dullness in others."
-- Samuel Johnson
"He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up."
-- Paul Keating
"He had delusions of adequacy."
-- Walter Kerr
"There's nothing wrong with you that reincarnation won't cure."
-- Jack E. Leonard
"He has the attention span of a lightning bolt."
-- Robert Redford
"They never open their mouths without subtracting from the sum of human knowledge."
-- Thomas Brackett Reed
"He inherited some good instincts from his Quaker forebears, but by diligent hard work, he overcame them."
-- James Reston (about Richard Nixon)
"He loves nature in spite of what it did to him."
-- Forrest Tucker
"Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?"
-- Mark Twain
"His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork."
-- Mae West
"Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go."
-- Oscar Wilde
"He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather than illumination."
-- Andrew Lang (1844-1912)
"He has Van Gogh's ear for music."
-- Billy Wilder ¶ 10/17/2006 12:49:00 PM
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