Because I'm Trying.... Losing people in your life is never an easy thing to go through. Talking with my roommate tonight I realized how many people I have lost over the last ten years...and even before that, too. I watched people die in the hospital and felt the anguish down to the deepest parts of my soul. There is a joke out there that goes something to the effect that there are three guarantees in life....birth, death and taxes. And the scary part is that it is so true. We are all brought into this life to bring joy to others, and we all pay a tax in one form or another as we live. And then the day finally comes to where the Fates have decided that we need to move on. I believe in a form a reincarnation...I have experienced too much over the years to not believe that we all come back in some form. But I also believe in a power that watches over us and helps guide us down the life road, and gives us shelter when we need it badly. I have to admit that being so far from my 'family' has made things harder when dealing with the emotional problems, but I have to believe that someone is there to hold me when no one else will. Otherwise, I sometimes think that I would drown over the despair that threatens to swallow me whole at times. I know that my first love is with me...I have felt his prescence a few times, and the heart on my wrist is a constant reminder of the love I have for him. I know that he has been gone for nearly nine years, but he still hangs with me. I have to believe....I just have to.



  ¶ 8/14/2008 08:56:00 PM