Pain and Emotions Hey there...me again.

So this past weekend has been crazy for me. Very tiring, and very emotional. And Monday seems to follow in the footsteps.

I am not sure what is going on in my life anymore. Seems that when I get things set up right and as stable as I can get them, new things happen to knock me off the rock. I have a lot on my mind that I need to focus on again, and hopefully get lined up. I was asked by a friend of mine (hopefully he will remain my friend) today why I needed to plan for the future. I have had so many things up in the air and without resolution for so long in my life that I can't afford to live with uncertainties.

I know that there are a few people out there who are wanting to date me. But I am not sure that I can right now. With so many factors having come into play recently, I have had too many pans tossed into the fires.

I had to disappoint and hurt someone today that has been nothing but sweet and kind to me. And he may not want to talk to me any more after today. But I cannot honestly put someone through a relationship with me if I can't give them all of me and what I have. Perhaps one day in the future, but not right now. Hopefully he can understand that. I know that not everything can be planned out, but I can hopefully set the right strands in the spiderweb of life into play.

But, only time will be able to tell with anything in my life, my future and my destiny. I care for many people, but now is the time that I must focus on me and what will do good for me. Call me selfish. I need to be happy again before I can make someone else that way.

So, give me some time. I will be back again.....  ¶ 6/18/2007 01:09:00 PM