Short weeks blow! So it is already Wednesday and I am wondering why it only feels like a cross between Monday and Tuesday. You know, one of those early mornings where disaster looms somewhere on the horizon and you don’t know up from down…yet you can see the end somewhere in site as well. My project that I thought was complete isn’t done yet…and me and the girl working on it are about to pull our hair out. We don’t think we can handle it much more. And I just spilled my drink on my crotch so I look all pretty looking like I have leaked. And you know me and my almost near refusal to wear underwear. LOL

I am doing a little better today, though. My stomach isn’t hating me as much for the ice cream from over the weekend; my nerves aren’t as shot either. They are still shot, but I think they are starting to heal again. The desire to smoke is still there, though. I am proud of myself in not grabbing a pack yesterday, but I think that is more because my funds are shot. I had to hit the store yesterday to pick up cleaning and grooming supplies, so kissed more damn money goodbye. Why do stores have to start charging so much for things? I never really did understand that. Oh well.

Okay…I had a few people contact me yesterday to take me to task in regards to one of my postings yesterday. I wasn’t aiming towards anyone…just stating opinions. That is part of the point of a blog, is it not? Being able to state your opinion on items? We are all going to disagree on how things are perceived as that is part of the human nature. Those that I call friends I call them that for a reason. And it is not a title that I hope they take lightly…I don’t call just anyone my friend these days. Too much shit has happened over the last eight years that I allow anyone in close, or know most of my past.

So, I guess I shall go back to Thrive Mix 02 and listen to the crew from RENT belt out Seasons of Love. That always was a good song…

Words of Wisdom
Neither fire nor wind, birth nor death can erase our good deeds. ~ Buddha

It is good to dream, but it is better to dream and work. Faith is mighty, but action with faith is mightier. -- Thomas Robert Gaines

This we can all bear witness to, living as we do plagued by unremitting anxiety…It becomes more and more imperative that the life of the spirit be avowed as the only firm basis upon which to establish happiness and peace. ~ His Holiness, the Dalai Lama

Songs:
Alanis Morissette “Crazy” Claude Le Gache mix
Wynonna “I Want to Know What Love Is” remixed by Vic Latino  ¶ 5/31/2006 04:40:00 AM 0 comments

  Why am I not surprised? Talked to a friend of mine this morning and was trying to explain to him why I was a bit upset about events from over the weekend and he tells me that he is ‘rebuked for taking up for me’. I never asked him to do that. It is appreciated, but, ya know, I am not going to fall into the same damn trap the rest of the gay population has fallen into of finding their own little cliques and looking down on the rest of the population that does not match that criteria. I am tired of it. I will not apologize for standing on my own, for refusing to conform to the ‘standards’ of our society. If someone doesn’t like what I do, or how I do something, or who I talk to, then that is their own issue. I have a life that is trying to not involve drama or bullshit…something that seems to be so flagrant in the gay society. If you don’t like me or what I do, then don’t talk to me. I already get shit from half the crew my friend hangs with anyway. I don’t care anymore. Guess I ask a little more from those I call friends than others do these days. And people wonder why I am such a loner for being a people person.


HILARY DUFF LYRICS

"Wake Up"

There's people talking
They talk about me
They know my name
They think they know everything
But they don't know anything
About me

Give me a dance floor
Give me a dj
Play me a record
Forget what they say
Cause I need to go
Need to getaway tonight

I put my makeup on a saturday night
I try to make it happen
Try to make it all right
I know I make mistakes
I'm living life day to day
It's never really easy but it's ok

Wake Up Wake Up
On a saturday night
Could be New York
Maybe Hollywood and Vine
London, Paris maybe Tokyo
There's something going on anywhere I go
Tonight
Tonight
Yeah, tonight

The city's restless
It's all around me
People in motion
Sick of all the same routines
And they need to go
They need to get away
Tonight

I put my makeup on a saturday night
I try to make it happen
Try to make it all right
I know I make mistakes
I'm living life day to day
It's never really easy but it's ok

Wake Up Wake Up
On a saturday night
Could be New York
Maybe Hollywood and Vine
London, Paris maybe Tokyo
There's something going on anywhere I go
Tonight
Tonight
Yeah, tonight

People all around you
Everywhere that you go
People all around you
They don't really know you
Everybody watching like it's some kind of show
Everybody's watching
They don't really know you now
(They don't really know you)
(They don't really know you)
And forever

Wake Up Wake Up
(Wake Up Wake Up)
Wake Up Wake Up
(Wake Up Wake Up)

Wake Up Wake Up
On a saturday night
Could be New York
Maybe Hollywood and Vine
London, Paris maybe Tokyo
There's something going on anywhere I go

Wake Up Wake Up
On a saturday night
Could be New York
Maybe Hollywood and Vine
London, Paris maybe Tokyo
There's something going on anywhere
I go
Tonight
Tonight
Yeah, tonight  ¶ 5/30/2006 06:44:00 AM 1 comments

  Post Memorial Day Just a quickie update.

Did have something else here, but tired of arguing with people right now, so it came out. Dinner went okay on Saturday night...some drama but I guess it was okay. A few people have said thank you and they had a good time...but I am going to be hesitant about setting something else up. The whole process gave me a few reminders as why I don't normally plan any get togethers or attend many of them, either.

The dating thing is being put on halt at the moment. We talked some Saturday night, which resulted in both of us being on the defensive and a half gallon of ice cream now tearing my stomach up, and Sunday, and I told him that we should just take a break. Things are getting a little stressful with both of us in our jobs and trying to make the long-distance thing work is not going as well as we would like. Hell, we aren’t even able to see each other every weekend the way we want, either. But, we are going to remain friends and definitely in contact, so I guess we can’t ask for more right now. I still love and care for him…that will not change.

Have a good day…I have more listings to finish on one project before I switch over to my next disaster deadline!

Words from the Dalai Lama:

In this ever-changing world there are two important things that we should keep in mind. The first is self-examination. We should reexamine our own attitude toward others and constantly check ourselves to see whether we are practicing properly. Before pointing our fingers at others we should point it toward ourselves. Second, we must be prepared to admit our faults and stand corrected.

You can develop the right attitude toward others if you have kindness, love, and respect for them, and a clear realization of the oneness of all human beings.

We need to develop patience but impatience can also be conductive for such activities as cleaning and walking. With this mind of impatience once can become a woman or man of action. However, for bigger problems, patience is crucial.


And, if you get the chance, check out Ethan's page at Brat Boy School...yesterday's video post was a good rememberance of why we celebrate Memorial Day.  ¶ 5/30/2006 05:02:00 AM 0 comments

  .......................................................... Power is the ability to do good things for others.

-- Brooke Astor  ¶ 5/26/2006 11:47:00 AM 0 comments

  Praise and Blame according to a Russian Empress I praise loudly; I blame softly.
-- Catherine the Second (1729-1796) Russian Empress

This is how it should be in life period. However, we live among so many who don't want to take responsibility for their own actions...they always must point the finger at someone else.

"He who blames the loudest is the deepest in shame." -- Aiden*Ian Archangel  ¶ 5/26/2006 04:53:00 AM 0 comments

  Your Memorial Day Movie Releases The Promise (PG-13); Wide release A tale of passion that unfolds against a backdrop of war as a beautiful and mysterious princess becomes the object of affection for three very different men--a powerful duke, a brave general and a lowly slave. As passions spark and egos clash, lives will be ruined and lovers spurned and no one will ever be the same. Starring: Hiroyuki Sanada, Jang Dong-kun, Cecilia Cheung, Nicholas Tse, Liu Ye

X-Men: The Last Stand (PG-13); Wide release A "cure" for mutancy threatens to alter the course of history. For the first time, mutants have a choice: retain their uniqueness, though it isolates and alienates them, or give up their powers and become human. The opposing viewpoints of mutant leaders Charles Xavier, who preaches tolerance, and Magneto, who believes in the survival of the fittest, are put to the ultimate test--triggering the war to end all wars. Starring: Hugh Jackman, Patrick Stewart, Ian McKellen, Halle Berry, Anna Paquin

Fanaa (NR); Limited release Choices... to choose between right or wrong is simple, but what defines one's life is the decision between the greater of two goods or the lesser of two evils. This is the advice that Zooni Ali Beg receives from her father just as she is about to venture out into the world on her own for the very first time. Little does she know that these very words will shape her life. Zooni, a blind Kashmiri girl, meets Rehan Qadri, a local tour guide and an incorrigible flirt, who goes from city to city exploring their architecture and also the women. Her friends warn her against this good-for-nothing roadside Romeo, but she chooses to ignore them. She is not one to be protected. It is now her time to discover life, and love. Is this really the right choice? Rehan is fascinated by Zooni. He truly wants her to see life as it should be seen, in its many colors -- and as he promises her, the time spent with him will be the most precious in all her life. Zooni sees Delhi, life and love like she never has before, because of Rehan. What Zooni doesn't know is that Rehan has another side of his life that he has kept from her - something that cannot only change her life, but can also destroy it. Starring: Aamir Khan, Kajol, Tabu, Shiney Ahuja, Abhishek Bachchan


Upcoming Releases

Cars (G); Wide release; opens 6/9
The Break-Up (PG-13); Wide release; opens 6/2
The Omen (NR); Wide release; opens 6/6
A Prairie Home Companion (PG-13); Wide release; opens 6/9

Where ignorance is our master, there is no possibilty of real peace.  ¶ 5/25/2006 12:22:00 PM 0 comments

  ... There is nothing in Christianity or Buddhism that quite matches the sympathetic unselfishness of an oyster.

When one is in an intense state of hatred, even a very close friend appears somehow annoying. If one harbors hateful thoughts, it ruins one's health. Even if one has wonderful possessions, in the moment of anger one feels like throwing them or breaking them. So there is no guarantee that wealth alone can give one the joy or fulfillment that one seeks. ~The Dalai Lama

Album of the Day: Godsmack, IV

Only a day and half left before I am off for three days for Memorial Day weekend!  ¶ 5/25/2006 06:46:00 AM 0 comments

  My horoscope Today:

You deserve a reward for all your hard work. Make a list of the things that used to delight you in childhood and pick one or two that look feasible. Then go ahead and indulge, indulge, indulge. It's just what you need.


Maturity is achieved when a person postpones immediate pleasures for long-term values.
-- Joshua L. Liebman



Tomorrow:

Loved ones and coworkers treat you with respect when you treat yourself with respect. Isn't it funny how that works? So rise to meet this challenge with your ethics and your sense of integrity not only intact, but functioning.  ¶ 5/24/2006 12:30:00 PM 0 comments

  Current listening pleasure Mynt: Still Not Sorry
India Arie ft Akon: I'm Not My Hair
Depeche Mode: A Pain that I'm Used to
Dixie Chicks: Not Ready to Make Nice
Jeannie Ortega: So Done
Iio: Dreaming of Now
DT8 ft Andrea Britton: Winter  ¶ 5/24/2006 07:27:00 AM 0 comments

  Dear Mr. President....Words from P!nk and the Indigo Girls   ¶ 5/24/2006 07:07:00 AM 0 comments

  Hump Day "Its not the critic that counts, not the man/woman who points out how the strong man/woman stumbles or where the doer of deeds could have done them better; the credit belongs to the man/woman in the arena whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly... who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends him/herself in a worthy cause, who at best knows in the end, the triumph of high achievement, and who at worse if he/she fails at least fails while daring greatly. so that his/her place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who never have known neither victory or defeat." - Teddy Roosevelt

Buddhism holds that everything is in constant flux. Thus the question is whether we are to accept change passively and be swept away by it or whether we are to take the lead and create positive changes on our own initiative. While conservatism and self-protection might be likened to winter, night, and death, the spirit of pioneering and attempting to realize ideals evokes images of spring, morning, and birth.

A friend is one who sees through you and still enjoys the view.
-- Wilma Askinas (1926- ) American Author

Ignorance is the source of hatred, and the way to get rid of ignorance is realization. ~ His Holiness, the Dalai Lama

Only a couple more days and my boy will be down here for the weekend. I can’t wait…that should definitely put me back into a good mood…although I will still have to work on Friday while he is down. Only two more weeks and then I can get these fucking wisdom teeth cut out…bitch session there.

Not writing too much today…I will start picking up and posting more come next week. This week has just been too crazy with work and bullshit from people that I thought were friends. You think you know someone and find out that you really don’t. C’est la vie…I gots more important shit to worry about right now.

Have a great day…I plan on tanning tonight and then straightening up the house. And actually cook dinner tonight. I forgot lunch again.

Song of the Day: Tatu: All About Us Dixie Chicks: Not Ready to Make Nice  ¶ 5/24/2006 04:02:00 AM 0 comments

  ... I think laughter may be a form of courage. As humans we sometimes stand tall and look into the sun and laugh, and I think we are never more brave than when we do that.
-- Linda Ellerbee (1944- ) American Journalist  ¶ 5/23/2006 12:24:00 PM 0 comments

  Quotes for the day The nobler sort of man emphasizes the good qualities in others, and does not accentuate the bad. The inferior does the reverse. ~Confucius (551-479 BC) Chinese Philosopher

You only lose what you cling to.

Little progress can be made by merely attempting to repress what is evil; our great hope lies in developing what is good. ~Calvin Coolidge


We live in illusion and the appearance of things. There is a reality. We are that reality. When you understand this, you see that you are nothing, and being nothing, you are everything. That is all.

You can easily judge the character of others by how they treat those who can do nothing for them or to them. ~Malcolm Forbes (1919-1990) American Publisher

We could say that meditation doesn't have a reason or doesn't have a purpose. In this respect it's unlike almost all other things we do except perhaps making music and dancing. When we make music we don't do it in order to reach a certain point, such as the end of the composition. If that were the purpose of music then obviously the fastest players would be the best. Also, when we are dancing we are not aiming to arrive at a particular place on the floor as in a journey. When we dance, the journey itself is the point, as when we play music the playing itself is the point. And exactly the same thing is true in meditation. Meditation is the discovery that the point of life is always arrived at in the immediate moment. On the contrary, Subhuti, those Bodhisattvas who, when these words of the sutra are being taught, will find even one single thought of serene faith, will be such as have honoured many hundreds of thousands of Buddhas, such as have planted their roots.

From the Dalai Lama……
As human beings we all want to be happy and free from misery…we have learned that the key to happiness is inner peace. The greatest obstacles to inner peace are disturbing emotions such as anger and attachment, fear and suspicion, while love, compassion, and a sense of universal responsibility are the sources of peace and happiness.

Suffering increases your inner strength. Also the wishing for suffering makes the suffering disappear.

Song of the moment: Danielle Bolinger "When the Broken-hearted Love Again"  ¶ 5/22/2006 07:30:00 AM 0 comments

  Silly fag, drama is for queens I didn’t think that there were things that would still rile me up, but apparently I was wrong. Came to find out yesterday that a guy that I had messed around with awhile back has started talking to a few of my friends. Me and him had had it out a few times because I kept trying to explain to him that I was not looking for anything other than friends. My schedule didn’t free up normally until around 10pm because of working two jobs, so that did make things hard. My friends know that I keep a very busy schedule and it is not always that easy for me to squeeze in the time for everyone that I would like. So, we hung out and there was some harmless flirting and a little fun in there, but nothing on a really major scale. He started falling pretty hard, but I knew that he was not ready for dating someone like me, nor was he really ready to be immersed in the gay world. He has just come out of the closet after at least ten years of hiding. It finally sunk into his head that he had mis-read the signs and that I was actually happy with the guy I am seeing now. Or at least I thought it had. I got a phone call from my best buddy that they were talking and this kid was going on how he didn’t want to lose me and all this other shit. I explained the situation and my bb understood and was cool. He knew me too well and knew that I would not do anything to hurt my babe…I care too much.

Several hours went by and I started falling asleep on the couch while watching TV. The phone rings. It is my best bud again. Come to find out that my frat brother had been talking to the guy and was automatically believing what the newbie said. He didn’t even try to contact me in any way. That pissed me off, and pissed my best bud off.

If you want to start drama, that is fine. But don’t start it with me. I am tired of the shit and games that so many damn fags sit and pull. I have my own life, I am VERY happy with the guy that I am seeing, and I won’t do put up with any shit. If you want to play that game, then that is fine. But, I don’t have time in my life for it, and I DON’T have time for you.

Have a good life.

Song of the day: “Haters” by Hilary Duff  ¶ 5/22/2006 04:02:00 AM 0 comments

  Quote for the afternoon. Little progress can be made by merely attempting to repress what is evil; our great hope lies in developing what is good.

-- Calvin Coolidge  ¶ 5/19/2006 12:50:00 PM 0 comments

  Movie Friday National Release
The Da Vinci Code (PG-13); The murder of a curator at the Louvre reveals a sinister plot to uncover a secret that has been protected since the days of Christ. Only the victim's granddaughter and Robert Langdon, a famed symbologist, can untangle the clues he left behind. The duo become both suspects and detectives searching for not only the murderer but also the stunning secret of the ages he was charged to protect. Starring: Tom Hanks, Audrey Tautou, Alfred Molina, Ian McKellen, Jean Reno

Over the Hedge (PG); A tale centering around a mischievous con-artist raccoon named R.J. and a sensitive turtle named Verne. When R.J., Verne and their woodland friends find a suburban housing development encroaching on their forest home, Verne's first instinct is to retreat into his shell and leave. But the ever-opportunistic R.J. sees a treasure trove to be had from his unsuspecting new neighbors. Together, Verne and R.J. form an unlikely friendship as they learn to co-exist with--and even exploit--this strange new world called suburbia. Starring: Bruce Willis, Garry Shandling, William Shatner, Wanda Sykes, Nick Nolte

See No Evil (R); Seven feet tall. Four hundred pounds. A rusty steel plate screwed into his skull and razor-sharp fingernails that pluck out his victims' eyes. Reclusive psychopath Jacob Goodnight is holed up in the long-abandoned and rotting Blackwell Hotel, alone with his nightmares until eight petty criminals show up for community service duty along with the cop who put a bullet in Jacob's head four years ago. When one of their own is kidnapped by the killer and her fate uncertain, the remaining lawbreakers must fight this indestructible force of nature with a violent score to settle. Starring: Glen Jacobs, Michael J. Pagan, Tiffany Lamb, Penny McNamee, Craig Horner

Limited Release
Moonlight (NR); A thirteen-year-old Claire discovers a wounded and bleeding boy her age in her family's garden shed. The boy is a young drug courier from Afghanistan, shot and wounded after serving his purpose as human packing material. Claire decides to keep the boy a secret. He slowly recovers under her care. They fall in love. When things get too difficult for them, they decide to flee. On the run from criminals they live their lives in the fast lane.Starring: Laurien Van Den Broeck, Jemma Redgrave, Andrea Howard, Hunter Bussemaker, Johan Leysen

Coming Soon:
The Promise (PG-13); Wide release; opens 5/26
X-Men: The Last Stand (PG-13); Wide release; opens 5/26

The basic sources of happiness are a good heart, compassion, and love. If we have these mental attitudes, even if we are surrounded by hostility, we feel little disturbance. On the other hand, if we lack compassion and our mental state is filled with anger or hatred we will not have peace. ~ His Holiness the Dalai Lama  ¶ 5/19/2006 03:57:00 AM 0 comments

  What you think upon grows...

In our daily lives problems are bound to arise. The biggest problems in our lives are the ones that we inevitably have to face, like old age, illness, and death. Trying to avoid our problems or simply not thinking about them may provide temporary relief, but I think that there is a better approach. If you directly confront your suffering, you will be in a better position to appreciate the depth and nature of the problem. If you are in a battle, as long as you remain ignorant of the status and combat capability of your enemy, you will be totally unprepared and paralyzed by fear. However, if you know the fighting capability of your opponents, what sort of weapons they have and so on, then you're in a much better position when you engage in war. In the same way, if you confront your problems rather than avoid them, you will be in a better position to deal with them.
-His Holiness the Dalai Lama


Because we all share an identical need for love, it is possible to feel that anybody we meet, in whatever circumstances, is a brother or sister.  ¶ 5/18/2006 03:46:00 AM 0 comments

  ... What is now proved was once only imagined.

-- William Blake (1757-1827) English Poet  ¶ 5/17/2006 11:03:00 AM 0 comments

  Bare-ing it all Okay…I have gotten a few questions from several folks, here and elsewhere, about what I use for the tanning. In all honestly, most of my tan has come from being out on the beach a couple of times, and being down at the pool. I am one of the lucky ones that seems to absorb the sun with no issues…or very few.

However, I do use the tanning bed as a supplement, and in the winter months, since I am a desert baby and don’t really like the way I look when I am pale. I don’t like the tan lines much, either, but I have low cut speedos so it is okay. They don’t show when my pants slip down a little bit. At least my man hasn’t complained yet. LOL

Here is my normal regimen, divided out into natural and fake-n-bake:
Natural:
When getting started on the tanning, I use Tan Amplifier Bronzing Spray, Hot Tropic Fragrance by Hawaiian Tropic. Now, it does not have any sunscreen in it, so be careful if you burn easy. I do get a little red if I have not started my base tan, but do pretty well otherwise. Lay out for roughly 45 minutes on front and back and I have the start of a decent tan. I have only done that three times at the beach and once at the pool this year.

Fake-n-bake:
The spray I use is HP2000, High Power Super Dry Body Oil Tyrosine/Aloe Vera Formula from Vital Performance. It comes in a 6oz spray bottle. I have two options at my tanning salon: the bed and the standup booth. The bed is a Sunstar 332 traditional 20 minute bed with high pressure facial lamps. The booth is a Sandome 548V Booth 10 minute high pressure. Either one is really good. I have been twice so far. If you want to darken your tan, I would say two to three times a week should be good. Since I have a month of unlimited, I am trying to set up for every other day.

So, take your pick, I guess. If I had my choice, I would be spending all my time out in the sun; but, since I can’t, I balance them all out. Now, where’s that cabana boy in the hot speedo? I need a drink!

Words of Wisdom
I would like to explain the meaning of compassion, which is often misunderstood. Genuine compassion is based not on our own projections and expectations, but rather on the rights of the other: irrespective of whether another person is a close friend or an enemy, as long as that person wishes for peace and happiness and wishes to overcome suffering, then on that basis we develop genuine concern for his or her problem. This is genuine compassion. Usually when we are concerned about a close friend, we call this compassion. This is not compassion; it is attachment. Even in marriage, those marriages that last only a short time do so because of attachment - although it is generally present - but because there is also compassion. Marriages that last only a short time do so because of a lack of compassion; there is only emotional attachment based on projection and expectation. When the only bond between close friends is attachment, then even a minor issue may cause one's projections to change. As soon as our projections change, the attachment disappears - because that attachment was based solely on projection and expectation. It is possible to have compassion without attachment - and similarly, to have anger without hatred. Therefore we need to clarify the distinctions between compassion and attachment, and between anger and hatred. Such clarity is useful in our daily life and in our efforts towards world peace. I consider these to be basic spiritual values for the happiness of all human beings, regardless of whether one is a believer or a nonbeliever.
-His Holiness the Dalai Lama

What you think upon grows...

First one must change. I first watch myself, check myself, then expect changes from others.

I pray for a more friendly, more caring, and more understanding human family on this planet. To all who dislike suffering, who cherish lasting happiness, this is my heartfelt appeal.

Shared joy is a double joy; shared sorrow is half sorrow. -- Swedish proverb

Song of the day: Eric Himan's "Us Little People" from I Go On...  ¶ 5/17/2006 05:28:00 AM 1 comments

  Tanning
Been working on the tan lately...I miss my darkness of my childhood days. I used to be able to spend so much time outside...now I have to combine the bed and the beach to get where I used to be. But...the good part, I look good and it will last me most of the winter as well. Can't complain there!

Where ignorance is our master, there is no possibility of real peace.
-His Holiness the Dalai Lama

First one much change. I first watch myself, check myself, then expect changes from others.

Song on the road: Robyn - Show Me Love

This one I put in just because I actually look a little butch in it from not shaving for a few days.

The computer is almost up and running...just need to install a couple more things to it so I can actually function. Has anyone seen the movie Robots yet? I had recorded it and finally watched it last night. It was hilarious! Especially when Robin William's character does a whole little Britney number, complete with backlighting. You gotta see it sometime...a nice little way to add some humour into an otherwise shitty day.

  ¶ 5/16/2006 03:56:00 AM 3 comments

  One week ends and another begins I am not going to say a whole lot today. This past weekend ended up being drama-filled on one aspect or another. Zach came down for a visit and ended up driving back Saturday night partially intoxicated after I told him to go stay at Brian's. I cried afterwards and have slept on the couch for the last two nights. We have discussed things and are going to try again...but we will see what happens, I guess. Saturday morning saw drama with someone else while trying to head out to the beach (did make it and got some sun on my shoulders and upper back) and that night saw me trying to sort it for someone else. Well, more of trying to not have it expand for someone else and get one person to calm down. Trying to explain to a frat brother that he should not follow his emotions right now was not an easy thing to do. But, hopefully he will listen to the advice that was given.

I should hopefully have my home computer up and running in the next couple of days...my software is supposed to be arriving today according to FedEx.

Checked my horoscope this morning on Friendster....funny that it had this to say:
The Bottom Line
Hold strong to your convictions, but be objective about the opinions of others too.
In Detail
There will be a lot of back-and-forth today -- sharing ideas has taken a front seat in your life, and it's rewarding to find yourself in such accord with so many people you respect. Another rewarding aspect of all these discussions is that they remind you of what you believe and what governs your life. You'll find these convictions to be strengthened over the next few days. Listen to opposing viewpoints with objectivity -- above all else, do not judge others!

Too bad it didn't come yesterday...it might have been a little handy.

Words of Wisdom
One has to try to develop one's inner feelings, which can be done simply by training one's mind. This is a priceless human asset and one you don't have to pay income tax on!
~ His Holiness the Dalai Lama

The person who has a tremendous reserve of patience and tolerance has a certain degree of tranquility and calmness in his or her life. Such a person is not only happy and more emotionally grounded, but also seems to be physically healthier and to experience less illness. The person possesses a strong will, has good appetite, and can sleep with a clear concience.
~ His Holiness the Dalai Lama

My message is the practice of compassion, love and kindness. Compassion can be put into practice if one recognizes the fact that every human being is a member of humanity and the human family regardless of differences in religion, culture, color and creed. Deep down there is no difference.
~ His Holiness the Dalai Lama

It's better to light a candle than to curse the darkness.
~ Chinese proverb

I will make love my greatest weapon and none on who I call can defend against its force....My love will melt all hearts liken to the sun whose rays soften the coldest day.
~ Og Mandino

Song of the Day: "CALL ME CALL ME", from Cowboy Bebop, by Steve Conte and the Seatbelts

Lyrics:
  ¶ 5/15/2006 03:47:00 AM 0 comments

  The end of the Wor...I mean Week...is here! Friday has come, hoorah hoorah!! Only eight more hours left in my day and then I can...

*We're sorry, but we are interrupting your normally broadcasted viewing of Aiden Archangel's CRAWL INTO MY HEAD to bring you this Friday Update*

Your current weather forcast for this weekend down at the beaches (SE North Carolina):
Friday: 77, sunny and nice
Saturday: 77, partly sunny with some slim chances of afternoon showers
Sunday: 73, mostly cloudy with stronger chances for rain

The movie forecast? That might be a little more circumspect this week. But, I will leave the decisions up to you.

National Releases
Goal! The Dream Begins Starring: Kuno Becker, Stephen Dillane, Anna Friel, Marcel Iures, Sean Pertwee. How far would you go to live your dreams? When Santiago Munez is given the chance of a lifetime, he must leave his family, his life in Los Angeles and everything that he knows to travel halfway around the globe to England and into a completely foreign world--the exciting, fast-paced and glamorous world of international soccer.

Just My Luck Starring: Lindsay Lohan, Chris Pine, Samaire Armstrong, Carlos Ponce, Bree Turner. Ashley is a young professional just out of college. She also happens to be the luckiest woman in the world, who has lived a super-charmed life and has always taken her good luck for granted. When she kisses a handsome stranger at a costume party, Ashley accidentally swaps her good fortune for his horribly bad luck, and her charmed life turns into a living hell.

Poseidon Starring: Kurt Russell, Josh Lucas, Emmy Rossum, Jacinda Barrett, Richard Dreyfuss. After a rogue wave capsizes a luxury cruise ship in the North Atlantic, a small group of survivors find themselves unlikely allies in the ensuing battle for their lives in "Poseidon." Determined to fight their way to the surface, they must forge a path upward through layers of wreckage as the ship continues to sink, drawing upon skills and strengths they didn't even know they had, fighting against time for their own survival and for each other. Also showing in IMAX where available. (As one of my friends put it, can this not be called Titanic 2? I still will probably end up seeing it, though.)

Limited Release
Dead Man’s Shoes Starring: Paddy Considine, Gary Stretch, Toby Kebbell, Stuart Wolfenden, Neil Bell. Seven years after he left to join the army, Richard returns to the moorland town he grew up in. Accompanied by his younger simple-minded brother Anthony, he sets out to wreak vengeance on the gang of petty thugs who tormented his sibling during his absence.

Keeping up with the Steins Starring: Jami Gertz, Daryl Hannah, Garry Marshall, Jeremy Piven, Doris Roberts. Like the young Indian braves of long ago, Benjamin Fiedler is about to undergo an initiation rite that will take him from boy to man. But, rather than face the perils of the hunt, he must endure something far worse -- a Bar Mitzvah in Brentwood, Calif. Every family has their own dysfunction and neuroses and the Fiedlers are certainly no exception. Despite this, they ultimately realize that family is the most precious bond that can't be broken (but it can be bent out of shape at times).

Saving Shiloh Starring: Scott Wilson, Ann Dowd, Gerald McRaney, Jason Dolley, Bonnie Bartlett. This is the final installment of the trilogy based on the award-winning novel. Marty and his family attempt to help Shiloh's previous owner, Judd Travers, redeem himself after a near-fatal truck accident. The rest of the community, however, is convinced that Judd can never change. When Judd is suspected of murdering a man who has disappeared, Marty fears he and Shiloh are in a dangerous situation.

Wah-Wah Starring: Gabriel Byrne, Miranda Richardson, Emily Watson, Julie Walters, Nicholas Hoult. This coming-of-age story is told through the eyes of young Ralph Compton. Set during the last gasp of the British Empire in Swaziland in 1969, it focuses on the dysfunctional Compton family whose gradual disintegration mirrors the end of British rule.

Upcoming Releases
The Da Vinci Code
Over the Hedge
See No Evil
An Inconvenient Truth
X-Men: The Last Stand
The Break-Up
Cars
The Devil Wears Prada
Superman Returns

If this week’s releases don’t sound that appetizing to you, then look for these still playing at a theater near you:

Mission: Impossible III
An American Haunting
Stick It
United 93
Ice Age: The Beginning
Silent Hill
Scary Movie 4


Hope you find something to do and keep yourself out of trouble! Have a great weekend.

Words of Wisdom
Old friends pass away, new friends appear. It is just like the days. An old day passes, a new day arrives. The important thing is to make it meaningful: a meaningful friend - or a meaningful day. In the practice of tolerance, one's enemy is the best teacher.
-His Holiness the Dalai Lama

Freedom is the true source of human happiness and creativity. Irrespective of whether you are a believer or nonbeliever, whether Buddhist, Christian, or Jew, the important thing is to be a good human being.  ¶ 5/12/2006 04:07:00 AM 0 comments

  I missed the hump day... Thursday is here and I am so fcuking ready for the weekend! I have managed to stab myself at least ten times with my pen or pencil today. Probably a good thing that they aren’t sharp! Zach would have to start wondering if I was self-abusive. LOL (I promise I really am not! Half the cuts I find I don’t even know I got!)

Tomorrow is going to be really nice…my baby will hopefully be down here waiting for me at the apartment…if not, he should be down shortly afterwards. I was going to go tan, but I think I will save that until Saturday when we are laying out on the beach. Speaking of which, I just found a pretty good lil’ place over on Eastwood called Solar Hair. The beds are really high pressure. I was laying in there with the speedo on and already have a tan line from it! So, I think I should stay pretty dark this summer. Can’t wait!

I will be offline from home for a bit longer until I get the software for my computer. But, that should be here this week, so I can’t wait.

And now I get to fret over my aunt again. Mom emailed me saying that my aunt had taken another turn for the worse and they were heading up to New Jersey Wednesday night. I can cross my fingers, but I am prepared this time around.

Hope that everyone has a good day and I will be posting the movie releases either later today or tomorrow morning.

Words of Wisdom
Everyone who has ever taken a shower has had an idea. It's the person who gets out of the shower, dries off, and does something about it that makes a difference. ~ Nolan Bushnell

If you have the courage to begin, you have the courage to succeed. ~ David Viscott

In the practice of tolerance, one's enemy is the best teacher. ~ His Holiness the Dalai Lama


Song of the Day: I’m Gonna Take That Mountain by Reba McEntire.  ¶ 5/11/2006 09:47:00 AM 0 comments

  Tuesday rambles Don’t you hate it when you have thoughts swirling through your head and you can’t organize them long enough to be able to place them on paper? That is what I am going through right now…not fun!

So, I am just going to leave you with a few quotes for the day.

Talk to you later

For those who may not find happiness to exercise religious faith, it's okay to remain a radical atheist, it's absolutely an individual right, but the important thing is with a compassionate heart -- then no problem. ~ His Holiness the Dalai Lama

The time to repair the roof is when the sun is shining. ~ John F. Kennedy (This one is for those of us who feel like they need to fix a problem even as it gets compounded…my friend’s boyfriend seems to think that and I can’t fully understand why he can’t see it isn’t working right now.)

That reminds me…is May being nicknamed “National Relationship Issues Month”? Almost all my friends that are in relationships are having issues of one sort or another in the last two weeks.

Human potential is the same for all. Your feeling, “I am not of value,” is wrong. Absolutely wrong. You are deceiving yourself. We all have the power of thought—so what are you lacking? If you have willpower, then you can do anything. It is usually said that you are your own master. ~ His Holiness the Dalai Lama

Song of the Day: “Rush” by Allie and AJ
"Where'd You Go" by Fort Minor  ¶ 5/09/2006 11:15:00 AM 0 comments

  Some new reading material Came across this today..... Towleroad'
Check it out...there is some commentary in there that I find pretty funny...like the Razorbacks photo of Moore, Goode, and Dick standing next to each other with their backs to the camera. You could never have planned that any better.  ¶ 5/08/2006 10:19:00 AM 0 comments

  Monday commentary Another day, another dollar is how the saying goes. And somewhere in the world it is 5pm and people are sitting down to have their dinner and a beer or two. Please, have one for me?

This weekend went okay. I managed to get into Fayetteville earlier than the last time, so that allowed for some extra time with my boy. Part of that time, though, was spent drawing flames on Christina’s wall for her fiancé’s birthday present. He is a cop and fire fighter and she wanted to change the room above the garage into a game room with a fire theme to it…his fire trucks will be displayed on shelves around the room. She was extremely ecstatic with the results of the outlines…the painting was up to her. I don’t do that shit! And while placing my handiwork on the wall, Zach teased Daisy Bulldog with the laser pointer and let her get some exercise. She had already managed to pop the blue bouncy ball we had picked up for her a couple of weeks prior…she needed to get running around. So then Zach got accused of being a bulldog hurter because she was sore from running everywhere and exercising…I thought it was hilarious, actually. He is Christina’s little brother she never wanted. I think the relationship is cute.

Our friend NB showed up that evening and joined us for dinner at the Olive Garden. I so miss that place. I can’t wait until ours is up and running…I need some new options for eating out. It was a good time listening to NB talk about breaking Zach’s leg if he put in for his retraining application…he doesn’t want Zach to go out of state at all. I don’t blame him, although I have to laugh when he talks about thinking of taking a traveling job. Such is the life of the friends that I keep near me. The best part of that night, though, was sitting at the restaurant and listening to our waitress tell her friend (and us as we all were at the same table) about one of the waiters who was a jerk and slept with some skanky looking chic in between nights of sleeping with her. The kicker: they all worked at the same restaurant! The skank had blue eye shadow on that night…looked like a flash-back to the ‘80’s. The boys kept coughing ‘slut’ every time she passed by…or coughing into their hands and miming powder exploding onto their face. It was fucking hilarious. Made for a good way to relieve the tension we all had been feeling the last week with each of our situations.

The club was a slightly different story, though. Several people had been asking me if we had been banned because of a couple of incidents that had occurred over the last few weeks. No one from the club itself had informed us of it, and when it was mentioned a few weeks prior, we were told that it was a joke and everything would be okay. Come to find out, it a fucking crock of bull. Because of lies that were told, the co-owner of the club had decided that he was going to ban four people from the club and we had to explain the truth to him before he realized he had been had. The best part, though, was the people who were supposedly our friends kept giving us dark looks for DARING to show up at the club. I think we spent two hours at the club that night before saying fuck it and left. It was enough time for me to spend $40 bucks in drinks for my boys and dance a little bit. And enough for me to realize that I am glad that I don’t go out that often.

Why is it that there has to be some sort of drama when there is a gay boy involved? There was the bullshit at the club that Saturday night. I went onto Myspace earlier today and my EMT friend down in South Carolina had posted this bulletin:

“For everyone who has visited my myspace who works for the same company that I do.. If you have something to say about it.. I have a home phone, a nextel so you dont burn any of your minutes, the internet and you see me at work. So if you have a problem with me being gay or whatever CAUSED ALL THE LAUGHS AND GIGGLES please come to me with them dont cut jokes behind my damn back about me because thats just immature and to be working for and ambulance service you should be just alittle more mature than that.. This is 2006 gays are everywhere so i dont know what to tell you.. But just if you are going to go on my page and dont have anything good to say just stay the hell off of it.. thats exactly what happened to the other coworkers page but the thing is i can care less who knows.. SO YOU LAUGH ON BUT I CAN PROMISE YOU ONE THING ITS NOT AS FUNNY AS YOU ARE MAKING IT OUT TO BE.. IT SUCKS TO WORK WITH AN OPENLY GAY GUY DOESNT IT.. AND THE THING IS TO ACT LIKE YOU ARE SUCH A FRIEND TO THEIR FACE DAMN..”

It is sad when I see my friends having to deal with this bullshit all the time. I want to get Zach out of his current living situation…or at least knock some damn sense into the bitch that lives there. But, I have kept my mouth shut because I don’t want to cause any more issues for him or his ‘big brother’. I get very protective of the people that I get involved with…and I wish that I could do more for him. Maybe one of these days I will be able.

The funny part is that I don’t get jealous of any attention that my guy gets…at least not to a serious degree, anyway. But I definitely do get protective when he is getting the short end of the stick. Never did fully understand that. But, it is nice to see some testosterone does flow through my body most of the time. (Laugh…that was a joke)

There was something else that I was going to comment on today….my blondeness has apparently kicked it out of my head for the moment. Oh well. Maybe by the time I get home and see what I can do to get my computer working again this week, I will remember everything that I wanted to discuss.

To all my boys out there….keep on going strong. The last few weeks have been rough for a lot of you, I know. But, don’t worry. It will get better soon. That I can promise.

Song for the Day: Kim English “Treat Me Right”
Sheryl Crow "Always on Your Side"

Words of Wisdom
When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be. ~ Lao Tzu

All major religious traditions carry basically the same message, that is love, compassion and forgiveness - the important thing is they should be part of our daily lives. ~ His Holiness the Dalai Lama

The higher type of man clings to virtue, the lower type of man clings to material comfort. The higher type of man cherishes justice, the lower type of man cherishes the hope of favors to be received. ~ Confucius (551-479 BC) Chinese Philosopher

As human beings we all want to be happy and free from misery - we have learned that the key to happiness is inner peace. The greatest obstacles to inner peace are disturbing emotions such as anger and attachment, fear and suspicion, while love, compassion, and a sense of universal responsibility are the sources of peace and happiness. ~ His Holiness the Dalai Lama

We can never obtain peace in the outer world until we make peace with ourselves. ~ His Holiness the Dalai Lama


PS - Is my beer ready yet?  ¶ 5/08/2006 09:19:00 AM 0 comments

  Lets go to the Movies! This week’s releases, hopefully at a theatre near you:

Nationwide

An American Haunting: Based on a true state-documented case that took place during the 1800s. Between the years 1818-1820, the Bell family of Red River, Tennessee was visited by an unknown presence that haunted the family and eventually caused the death of one of its members. It was not until a manuscript of the local schoolteacher, who lived on the property during the disturbance, was found in 1998 that the horrifying and shocking answer to what caused this haunting would finally be unveiled. Starring: Donald Sutherland, Sissy Spacek, Rachel Hurd-Wood, James D’Arcy, Matthew Marsh

Hoot: When a Montana boy moves to Florida and unearths a disturbing threat to a local population of endangered owls, three middle-schoolers take on greedy land developers, corrupt politicians, and clueless cops. Determined to protect his new environment, the boy and his friends fight to prevent the adults from making a big mistake. Starring: Logan Lerman, Cody Linley, Dean Collins, Brie Larson, Luke Wilson

Mission: Impossible III: Recently retired, Agent Ethan Hunt lives a slower-paced life training new IMF agents. With this change, new opportunities enter his life, including a possible marriage to his girlfriend Julia. However, when a new conflict arises, Ethan is called back to duty to confront the toughest villain he's ever faced - Owen Davian, an international weapons and information provider with no remorse and no conscience. Starring: Tom Cruise, Ving Rhames, Kelly Brook, Eileen Atkins, Justin Kirk
(question…did they really need to make a third M:I movie? Granted, I did watch both of the last ones, and will probably watch this one as well, but, still?!)


Limited

Crazy Like A Fox: Nat Banks, a gentleman farmer, loses his family seat to a pair of real estate operators from Washington, D.C. But when the time comes for Nat to leave his ancestral home and move to a rental house in town, the pride of possession from so many generations on the same soil makes it impossible for him to go. He moves into a cave by the creek that runs through the back of his former property instead. Nat won't go down without a fight! He spends the summer there in a kind of Robinson Crusoe splendor in the wilds of Virginia, until the cold rains of November make the folly of his situation overwhelming. But when new owners leave Greenwood empty to spend the winter in Palm Springs, Nat and his family just move back in, to reclaim their family home until the spring thaw brings about a final confrontation between the dubious forces of progress and the old guard of Virginia. Starring: Roger Rees, Mary McDonnell, Paul Fitzgerald, Christina Rouner, Mark Joy

The Promise: A tale of passion that unfolds against a backdrop of war as a beautiful and mysterious princess becomes the object of affection for three very different men--a powerful duke, a brave general and a lowly slave. As passions spark and egos clash, lives will be ruined and lovers spurned and no one will ever be the same. Starring: Hiroyuki Sanada, Jang Dong-kun, Cecilia Cheung, Nicholas Tse, Liu Ye


Upcoming Attractions

Just My Luck
Goal! The Dream Begins
Poseidon
X-Men III: The Last Stand (you better believe I will be seeing this somehow before adding it to my collection!)

For all my friends around Wilmington: Sorry, but I will be MIA this weekend….my baby is kidnapping me for a few days. (And, trust, I will NOT be complaining!)

Have a great weekend! And, for those of you who will be experiencing rain…stay dry! The sun will be out soon enough!

Today’s Words of Wisdom from the Dalai Lama:
For a better, happier, more stable and civilized future, each of us must develop a sincere, warmhearted feeling of brotherhood and sisterhood.

Buddha never mentioned that the problems we have encountered are the result of misconstruction of a house or starting a project or work on an inappropriate day of time. Buddha always talked about the negative expenses as a result of having performed negative actions. So for a good practitioner there is no new year, there is no good day or bad day. (I SO need to remember that one!)

Song for the Day: Fefe Dobson “This is My Life”


In the depth of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer.
-- Albert Camus (1913-1960) French Writer  ¶ 5/05/2006 05:25:00 AM 0 comments

  It makes a difference... Okay, so yeah. I seem to not be doing very good with keeping my promises about updating quickly these days. Sorry!

So let me go back to this past weekend and then we will catch up from there.

News of the first degree: Me and Zach are doing good. It is a little rough not being in the same city, but we are making it through to the best of our abilities. He came down Friday night and met one of the finest from Duplin County….they are such jerks there. But, that is no worries…that will be taken care of with no problems. I managed to get some sun before he came down, and then just had him meet at JC’s house while I was getting things put together. Dinner with friends, and then back to the apartment to lay on the couch and watch TV for a bit. Saturday saw us over at JC’s place with the last minute preparations for twenty of the Southeast Coastal North Carolina to show up for a grill-out birthday party. Turned out pretty cool…no fights and everyone seemed to have a blast. My turkery burgers went pretty fast, but there were only four, so I am not complaining. Amber and her girlfriend made an unplanned trip down, so they came over for the festivities for a bit as well. It was so good to see her, and finally meet Nadine. Nadine is so sweet, too!! I am so glad that Amber is happy these days…she so fucking deserves it! (Brief history: Me and Amber used to work together while we lived in Greensboro and I have always told her that she would be the one girl that I would screw if I ever decided to switch sides for a day.) Saturday night? Four fags in a one bedroom apartment. And, no, none of THAT happened. Jeff and Jim stayed with me and we found out that my queen air mattress does fit in the living room…what a nice surprise!

Sunday saw me a little disappointed because Zach had to go home early, but I knew that he needed to get his schoolwork completed. So I trekked around town with JC and Jeff for a bit before finally going home and playing on the computer, trying to get my mp3 player to work and load songs.

Skip ahead a few days….

My week started off rough yet again. My weekend didn’t end totally on the good side. Saturday night saw me and the old roomie arguing about events that had happened the previous weekend while I was out of town. I do have to thank his boy for laying into him for the way that he was acting…I really do appreciate it. I understand that my friends have some concerns about what I do at times and want to make sure that I don’t get into anything that I will not be able to get myself out of…and that I am not irresponsible in the process. I appreciate that. But, I am a big boy, I have taken care of myself for awhile, and this would not be the first time that I have dealt with a situation like this. My request: Please trust me. Please be objective if you wish to discuss it…don’t jump to automatic reactions…that can cause a big rift in anything. As Kim English sings, “it makes a difference” how a person’s reaction comes across. That is the only thing that I really ask from anyone.

And I was not happy at work because of some issues that I don’t feel like getting into here. And, on top of that, my cell phone had been acting up again and starting to annoy me. Last week I had gone into the Alltel store that I normally frequent to see about replacing my phone. My usual company rep had been MIA, and my rep at the store was busy. So, I dealt with some new lady that got on my nerves the wrong way immediately. She was smug when she told me that they had discontinued my Nokia 6255i. She tried to tell me that my company discount would not apply for purchasing a new phone outright. Sorry…you don’t do that someone. And then she stated that I would have pay full price for a new phone because I had time left on my contract. Sorry, cookie…don’t think so. So, I politely called her a bitch under my breath and walked out the door…luckily my friend was there to tell her thank you for me. He even tried to call his rep to see if there was anything that I would be able to do…no answer, though. So, yesterday, after my phone had dropped several calls and decided that it wanted to turn itself off repeatedly for no reason, I said fuck it. My friend, Chris, had told me to go talk to his rep at the other store. Four o’clock rolled around and found me waiting fifteen minutes to talk with a girl named Carolyn. Sweet little girl, I do have to admit. She ended up hooking me up with a new phone and let me file an insurance claim for the old phone. I didn’t even have to pay the deductible…she billed that to my account for next month’s bill. Walked out with the Kyocera Slider Remix. It is actually pretty cool lookin’…and the best part is that I can still use my Bluetooth with it! That is always key. The graphics are very clear on it; I can play music if I wish. Hell, the phone came with the software and cables to move music from the computer to the phone…and two SIM cards to store it on as well. Oh…and the headphones for it as well. The downside is that only a portion of the headphones fit in my mp3 player, so it looks like I will still need to be replacing my old headphones.

Hopefully this weekend will see me traveling up to Fayetteville…I want to be able to hold my boy again. Yeah, I think I am falling for him. It is nice sleeping next to him at night…even if he might feel a little claustrophobic in the mornings because I am wrapped around him and he is shoved by the edge of the bed. Sorry, buddy, don’t mean to! But he knows that, and it is all cool.

So, I guess it is just a matter of waiting to see how things will unfold for this weekend. Cross my fingers…

Oh…and a word to one of my other friends: It will be okay, babe. Things will be rough and tense, but you will get through it all, and you know where to find us if you need us.

Song of the Day: Gillette’s “Sex Tonight”

Danni Minogue's "Put the Needle On It"

Words of Wisdom
Accept no one's definition of your life, but define yourself.
~Harvey Fierstein

Be kind whenever possible - It is always possible.
~His Holiness the Dalai Lama

At first dreams seem impossible, then improbable, then inevitable.
~Christopher Reeve (1952-2004) American Actor

believe that the very purpose of our life is to seek happiness. That is clear. Whether one believes in religion or not, whether one believes in this religion or that religion, we all are seeking something better in life. So, I think, the very motion of our life is towards happiness. ~His Holiness the Dalai Lama

The potential of the average person is like a huge ocean unsailed, a new continent unexplored, a world of possibilites waiting to be released and channeled toward some great good. ~Brian Tracy

Each of us in our own way can try to spread compassion into people's hearts. Western civilizations these days place great importance on filling the human "brain" with knowledge, but no one seems to care about filling the human "heart" with compassion. This is what the real role of religion is.
~His Holiness the Dalai Lama

We need a renaissance of wonder. We need to renew, in our hearts and in our souls, the deathless dream, the eternal poetry, the perennial sense that life is miracle and magic.
~E. Merrill Root (1895-1973) American Writer

Confidence on the outside begins by living with integrity on the inside. ~Brian Tracy

Basically we are all the same human beings with the same potential to be a good human being or a bad human being… The important thing is to realize the positive side and try to increase that; realize the negative side and try to reduce. That’s the way. ~The Dalai Lama

I love friends. I want more friends. I love smiles. That is a fact. How to develop smiles? There are a variety of smiles. Some smiles are sarcastic. Some smiles are artificial - diplomatic smiles. These smiles do not produce satisfaction, but rather fear or suspicion. But a genuine smile gives us home, freshness. ~The Dalai Lama

  ¶ 5/04/2006 10:39:00 AM 0 comments

  here yet not Okay…so I was gone for a few days. Shoot me. I will update on the weekend later. Otherwise…have a good day!

From the viewpoint of absolute truth, what we feel and experience in our ordinary daily life is all delusion. Of all the various delusions, the sense of discrimination between oneself and others is the worst form, as it creates nothing but unpleasantness for both sides. If we can realize and meditate on ultimate truth, it will cleanse our impurities of mind and thus eradicate the sense of discrimination. This will help to create true love for one another. The search for ultimate truth is, therefore, vitally important.
-His Holiness the Dalai Lama

I believe that the very purpose of life is to be happy. From the very core of our being, we desire contentment. In my own limited experience I have found that the more we care for the happiness of others, the greater is our own sense of well-being. Cultivating a close, warmhearted feeling for others automatically puts the mind at ease. It helps remove whatever fears or insecurities we may have and gives us the strength to cope with any obstacles we encounter. It is the principal source of success in life. Since we are not solely material creatures, it is a mistake to place all our hopes for happiness on external development alone. The key is to develop inner peace.
-His Holiness the Dalai Lama

Human beings are of such nature that they should have not only material facilities but spiritual sustenance as well. Without spiritual sustenance, it is difficult to get and maintain peace of mind.
-His Holiness the Dalai Lama

I think of life itself now as a wonderful play that I've written for myself... and so my purpose is to have the utmost fun playing my part.

 Shirley MacLaine

Compassion is not religious business, it is human business, it is not luxury, it is essential for our own peace and mental stability, it is essential for human survival.
-His Holiness the Dalai Lama

This is my simple religion. There is no need for temples; no need for complicated philosophy. Our own brain, our own heart is our temple; the philosophy is kindness.
-His Holiness the Dalai Lama

Self-respect is the root of discipline: The sense of dignity grows with the ability to say no to oneself.

 Abraham Joshua Heschel 1907-1972  ¶ 5/01/2006 03:55:00 AM 0 comments